(Bonnie addresses her captive audience. Average age: 8)
Bonnie: Now, I need everyone to put your right hand over your heart. If you are unsure which hand is your right, ask a neighbor.
Now, repeat after me. I, (say your name)...
Babies: I (mumbling which probably consisted of at least 5 people saying "say your name)...
Bonnie: Promise to NEVER...
Babies: Promise to NEVER...
Bonnie: EVEREVEREVER...
Babies: EVEREVEREVER...
Bonnie: touch anything backstage.
Babies: touch anything backstage.
Bonnie: I further promise...
Babies: I further promise...
Bonnie: to never *think* about touching anything, nor shall I sit on, breath beside or look longingly at anything backstage.
Babies: <<got a little unintelligible around here but I think the idea was there.>>
Bonnie: Now, we really can't ever touch anything backstage because backstage in a big theatre is pretty dangerous, you know? And we certainly don't ever sit on anything backstage. Why not?
Smart Baby: Because it might roll away!
Bonnie: YES. Almost everything backstage rolls, and it might hurt you, or hurt someone around you, or pull down the curtains or something. I mean, really bad things can happen when things start rolling. So, don't ever sit on ANYTHING backstage.
Sassy Baby who is definitely not my BFF: Can we sit on the floor? [eyeroll]
Bonnie: No. Now, that brings up a good point. Why shouldn't we sit on the floor backstage?
Precious, Terrified Baby: (with horror in her eyes)
BECAUSE IT MIGHT ROLL AWAY!!!
So, ladies and gentlemen, the next time you meet a small person who is horrified that the floor of the theatre might roll away any second, you can thank me.
Hey...I think a little terror is good for kids every now and then.
No comments:
Post a Comment