Why Animals are Horrible Photography Subjects...

I tried to have a photoshoot with Baby the Cat to send to Holly in her absence.  You know, just to let her know we're doing fine.

Yeah. We're doing fine.


FAQ:


Who is Baby?
Baby is, in theory, Holly's parents' cat.  Holly has been cat sitting for around, oh, 5 years.  And sometimes I do it when Holly leaves town.

I thought you didn't like cats. What's up with that?
I don't like cats.  Baby and I have an unexplainable bond, which is clear from that picture.  She likes to dig her claws into my boob and then try to jump.  It's her love language.

Is your willingness to post pictures of yourself looking like this the reason you're still single?
Yes. Absolutely.

Do me a solid...

...and stop trying to have fun, light-hearted events themed to The Great Gatsby.

Do all you want themed to "Roaring Twenties".  I love a good flapper dress.

I'm not a fan of prohibition themed events, but if that's your cup of tea, FINE.

But for all that is holy, please don't tell me your party, baby shower or wedding is themed to The Great Gatsby.

Cause if it is, I feel suspiciously like I'm gonna spend the entire event dodging cars and asking people to kindly refrain from going near the pool.

IT'S NOT AN UPLIFTING STORY, GUYS. CUT IT OUT.