My Fear of Failure and How It Relates to Blogging

I am enamored by blogs.  I mean, I read blogs *all* the time.  Sometimes I just google search for new blogs.  I read blogs by people I don't even know.  I'm comfortable enough to admit that to you, my blogging audience.

Therein lies the problem.  See, it takes a lot of confidence to blog.  You're just writing your little heart out, assuming that there is *anyone* out there who cares enough about your little life that they'll log on and think "I wonder what Bonnie's doing today?".

I've started blogs.  I had a MYCA Stars blogs that fell apart due to my own lack of blogging.  I had a MySpace blog that actually went fairly well until I decided that MySpace was the root of my relationship problems. Hint: don't EVER, I repeat EVER, omit your girlfriend from your Top 40 friends or whatever it is you have and then make excuses for why you won't change it...but that's neither here nor there. Oh, and another hint: MySpace isn't EVER the root of your relationship problems.  You're just kidding yourself if you think that.

This will be the blog that sticks.  I've learned not to make irrational promises to myself.  If I promise here in writing that I will blog every day, or every other day or whatever, I'll fail.  And when I fail, I decide that it's best to not do it.  I really don't like failure.  This is closely related to why I can't count calories ("Well, I've already had a Whopper and fries for lunch, so I'm screwed.  Pass the whole intact fried chicken, please.").  I will write when I want to, which hopefully will be more often than not.

So why are you going to read this?  I don't know.  My life is bizarre.  I have the most amusing friends.  I'm very emotionally invested in celebrity gossip, so you'll get a good dose of that every now and then.  But I don't know why you'll read this.  And I'm not sure I care.

One thing I've learned in the last year or so is how liberating it is to do things without worrying about someone else all the time.  So, I guess I'm doing this for me.

although i do kind of hope you're out there. :)